Chapter 10

The creative mother "opens windows to God's artistry and greatness." We recently took a family camping trip to the mountains. My husband loves the mountains, caves, rocks, forests, and most everything outdoors. I always preferred "anytown USA" with its restaurants and shops. Until meeting him and going on camping adventures together, I did not appreciate the outdoors. We traveled to the Grand Canyon and explored Utah on several different trips early in our marriage. God revealed himself to me in his creation in ways I will never forget during these times. "And while I believe that human creations can indeed be indirect expressions of God's creativity, I also believe that the farther we move from nature the more out of touch we can get with God's power and reality." (p.186) It was just wonderful to see our three children experience God's creation...hiking, camping, caving, climbing. We saw beautiful waterfalls, mountains and trees. The kids were sitting on a rock in a creek and said, "look at the big worm daddy!" My husband said, "where is the big worm?" They replied, "between those two rocks." (I love God's creation, but snakes still give me chills). I did not see the "big worm" thankfully. I must admit that there were times when I missed my comfy bed and my ceiling fan. (While I was trying to sleep while sweating with three kids, two adults, and a golden retriever all in the tent) But we were making memories, stretching ourselves, and enjoying God's creation. "So many of us in our plastic industrial world spend the bulk of our lives apart from any true natural beauty. We travel inside protected cars and feel the wind, rain, and snow on our faces only as we move from one enclosure to another. So many children in our industrial society grow up surrounded by glass, plastic, steel and asphalt. The spend most of their time with machines, televisions and stereos, game consoles and computers, and cars. They are rarely exposed to the natural elements that were meant to daily confront our soul with the greatness of God." (p.186)
So, looking back on this chapter confirms that we need many more camping trips together. We need to explore and reflect even in our own backyard.
I keep reading the "keeping perspective" (p.194-195) section of this chapter. Sally puts into words here just how great our role as mothers is and yet reminds me that we are not alone and all we need comes from the "Master Designer" himself.
I would love to hear about ways you and your family enjoy and experience God's creation and the ways God is making you a creative mother.
(Two more chapters to discuss...please email or post a comment about what you would like to read next!)

Chapter 9

I found this chapter very encouraging and motivating. "My attitude is ultimately what makes our house a peaceful haven. And because I can only accomplish this by leaning on the Lord, it is my relationship with him that ultimately will provide a nurturing environment for the people I love." (p.167) This is a big reminder for me. I tend to get frustrated and emotional quite easily. Motherhood has really brought this to the surface for me. I must rely on my daily walk with God and surrender myself to Him...this is the only way that my home will be peaceful.
I love organization and the process of organizing. I love my label maker and my files. As I mentioned in my "cleaning 101" post, I love a clean house but don't love the cleaning process. Well my new cleaning system has given me much freedom from stress and I have to admit that I am actually enjoying it a little. I made a list of all of my daily, weekly, monthly, bi-monthly tasks. My daily tasks I do every day, my weekly tasks are divided amongst six days (Sunday is my day off). My monthly and bi-monthly are assigned to days that have a lighter weekly task. I have been doing this for the past month and it is working quite well. I typically do my chores either first thing in the morning or after the kids are in bed. The daily tasks get done throughout the day. I have much less frustration about things because when I see the bathroom mirror needs cleaning on Thursday, I remember that it will get done on Saturday and I don't need to think about it today. Yes, I could just take the few minutes right then to clean the mirror, but then I would just find something else and then something else and there you go, I am frustrated about how there is no way I can clean this house and take care of three kids etc. etc. I know that through the course of the month everything will get done and that it will be easier the next time I do it. I am also learning which things may not need to be done every week and some things need to be done more than once a month. I am less stressed because each day has a manageable goal and it is not the end of the world if I miss a day. I am quite an emotional person and this system is taking a lot of the emotional swings of all that needs to be done out of the equation. Things are also cleaned the way I want them to be done. (Okay, maybe I have a little OCD/control issues, but that is for another day, right?) The other nice thing is that my husband knows the schedule (as it is posted below the family calendar) and I have been nicely surprised when coming home from a trip to the grocery after the kids are in bed that the chores have been done by him! (I could go on and on about how selfless and helpful and giving and never complaining he is, but again, that is for another day, right?)
I love all of the practical ideas and examples Sally gives us throughout this chapter. I won't quote and list them all, since you are reading the book too, but I find that reading this chapter is refreshing for me and motivating me. What a joy to read from someone who has been there, knows what we are going through and can give us practical wisdom from her experience and walk with God.
"Learning to live with the tension of never getting all of our work done and still being content is a worthwhile attitudinal goal as we serve our children." (p.169)
"The strong and secure future we help to build for our children is laid by the hundreds of small deeds we do every day as we serve faithfully in our homes. Yet the great value of our service will be felt for generations to come and throughout eternity." (p.176)

Part 3: Chapters 7 and 8

Wow has it been a long time! Have you all been busy with end of year parties, recitals, performances etc.? We are beginning our summer schedule/routine today and I am ready. (I hope). I hope you are continuing to enjoy the book...but most of all I hope you new moms (for the third time!) are soaking up those baby moments...soft skin, fuzzy hair, tiny toes! I am going to post about two chapters today since I haven't posted in over a month! Okay, I have to admit when I began reading chapter 7 and she was talking about gluing her teapot and alluding to how she had done this a lot, my mind went straight to that Brady Bunch episode when they broke the vase..."mom always said, 'don't play ball in the house.'" I know it is sad that 70s and 80s sitcoms still take up space in my brain! I do love all of her relationship principles in chapter 7. My husband and I have spent much time in late night conversation and prayer about these principles and our goals. We have started doing one on one outings with the kids too. (see "something to try..." in chapter 7) We have always planned on doing this and through the years have done so periodically. But I am realizing that if you don't plan it and make it a priority the days, weeks and months go by and it just doesn't happen. My #1 and I went to the paint your own pottery studio together. I was planning on painting something too, but am so glad I didn't. I just watched her paint, was 100% focused on her, listening to her chat away about her painting and what she wants to be when she grows up. After painting she wanted to go the bookstore and share hot chocolate and a cookie. She talked so openly and freely and gave me suggestions for what she would like to be different at home. (Her main request was to be able to help me cook more!...I never would have thought this is something she wanted) It was a wonderful night. I am looking forward to having this time with our other children too.
I enjoyed chapter eight too. Interestingly, my husband excels in the cultivating areas. He has always read beautiful poetry to our children, listened to classical music with them and taken them on adventures to the mountains, art museums, and gardens. We have always taken them out to dinner with us and the majority of the time they have great manners and behave better than most adults in the restaurant. :)
We will begin discussing Part 4: A Mother's Heart for Her Home in the coming weeks.
I would love to hear from you...what did you think of part 3? has reading this book changed you? changed what you do? I look forward to reading your posts and comments!

Cleaning 101

***Disclaimer***This post does not directly relate to our book club.
So my house cleaning experience goes back to my days in college when I would go to Stax gas station and get a 64 oz Dr. Pepper and a hot dog around 9 or 10 am on Saturday. I would then go back to my apartment (all 400 sq ft of it) and spend the day cleaning each room from head to toe while Lifetime tv movies played in the background. By afternoon I would be completely finished with an entirely clean house and could then go about my studying etc. Well, flash forward to now...three kids, more square footage and knowledge that my diet then was terrible. I am realizing that it is not possible to clean my house in one day...the demands of motherhood just won't allow it. I am trying to develop a new system (one that doesn't include a lifetime's worth of soda in one day). I have broken down all of the chores into daily, weekly, monthly, bimonthly, etc. and am making a schedule with a few tasks to complete each day so that over time everything will be clean (albeit not all on the same day, which I am learning is okay:). The reason for this post is to ask all of you what your routine is...how do you keep up with it all? Do you do it all in one day or split it up, if so, how do you split it up and most importantly are you able to keep it up? I would love to hear your insight into this. I really wish I enjoyed the process of cleaning as much as I enjoy a clean house. Looking forward to hearing from you!

Chapter Six

I must start off by apologizing for it taking me so long to post. There is really nothing monumental that has kept me from the blog. The past few weeks have been a big challenge with my #2 child. He is nearly 3yrs old and we have been experiencing a battle of wills. I won't go into all of the details except to say that I have felt everything from complete sadness to extreme frustration. One afternoon after putting him back in bed continuously for over an hour during naptime I was crying in my room, pouring my heart out to God....."God, please give me patience, how am I to handle all of this, I am exhausted, I don't deserve to be spit on, kicked, hit, yelled at, please help me." I felt this overwhelming sense of peace and knew that God was saying...."I know how you feel...I was yelled at, spit on, beaten beyond anything you will ever know...all because I love you. Don't give up. Come to me, I will give you rest." Our God is so powerful, so awesome and yet He is so gentle and tender. He knows us and wants us to experience His peace. The past three days my #2 has gone to bed at naptime, stayed in his bed and rested. He is happier and so am I.
Now for my thoughts from chapter six...I especially identified with her discussion of thoughts, what we think. Lately at night I will watch some television (I rarely have it on during the day or evening) after the kids have gone to bed and I am just too tired for anymore decluttering, unpacking boxes etc. But with watching the news programs filled with politics, energy crisis, climate crisis, food crisis, gas crisis, teenagers attacking each other, etc. etc. I find that I have a tendency to worry, fear for my children and the future. I will think about these things during the day and worry some more. I am realizing that I am not setting my mind on Christ and am allowing my thoughts to be on circumstances. Not to say that there aren't practical things I can do in light of our world's crises....but where is my hope, where is my treasure?
In the "something to try" on page 118 Sally mentions using music to teach your children. As a family, we love music and love to make worship mixes to listen to for our drive to school. I put a "Hide 'em in your heart Bible Memory melodies" in each of the kid's easter baskets this year. (in the resource list at the end of the book). We are all enjoying listening to them too.
Well, the end of my rambling, disjointed post has arrived. I hope you are all enjoying and learning from this book. I would love to hear from you either by post, comment or email. And congratulations to Jennifer on the birth of her son!

Miraculous in a Magical Sort of Way

I am astounded at the ways that scripture changes people and I always want to describe it as "magical". I don't mean magical in a fake, David Copperfield, smoke and tricky way, but magical as in awestruck or overcome with wonder. I think of Ezra when he saw Mickey's castle at Disney World--that was magical for him, and everytime we watch a Disney movie and the castle comes on the screen, he screams, "Mickey's castle" and his face is overcome with the same wonder. That's the way I feel when I see God's word make changes in others or in myself that could not have happened otherwise.

I loved chapter six for this reason. It encouraged me to keep pressing on with our kids, planting scripture deep down whether it seems to be affecting them right now or not. Tim and I were just talking about this last night, in fact, as we were feeling sad about some choices some of our "other kids" (teens from church) are making. We found ourselves getting down, wondering if anything we're doing, with our own kids or our "other kids" is making a difference. When this happens, we always come back to God's promise that His word will not return void. Among other things, of course, our job is to teach them the word and then watch God work His "magic" in their lives. So, we once again resolved to make reading the Bible together a nightly priority rather than the "2-3 times weekly, when we happen to remember" thing it has become.

So, when I read chapter 6 this morning, it was a huge confirmation to me, like God was saying, "You're on the right track. I'll take care of your kids--you just be obedient."

Chapter Five

I find myself reading and rereading the chapters in this book...in the pick up line at school, in the rocking chair during naptime, in the bed at night, and this week, thanks to my wonderful husband, in the massage chair getting a pedicure. He took an afternoon off, I got all three kids in bed for quiet time/nap time and then I headed off with my book. It amazes me how I feel that I need a break and then once I'm gone for ten minutes I am missing the kids and calling to check on them. I love reading about Sally's family and the stories about how she cares for her children. If you want to read more from her, I included a link to her blog in the sidebar.
Several things stood out to me in this chapter. "Often our lives are so overrun with small tasks that we get caught up in checking off the lists of things that need to be done and lose sight of the big picture. From there, we too easily fall into the trap of judging ourselves and our children by external standards of success and cultural priorities rather than by what really matters to God." (p.80-81) For someone who is a list maker/a little ocd/task oriented, this is something I need to remember every day. "I don't just want my kids to be moral. I don't just want them to know all of the biblical rules for behavior. I don't just want them to make it through my home with good grades, no drug addiction and no premarital sex. I want them to leave my home with a hunger and passion to know God personally and to be used by him to accomplish great things for his kingdom. I want them to personally hear God's voice and have his Spirit's gentle touch and impression on their hearts as they read the Scriptures and struggle with the issues of life." (p.80) This is the desire of my heart and I pray each morning will be the focus of my day.
I am seeing my #1 child grow in her relationship with Jesus. She asked Jesus into her heart last fall. Her prayer time is so special and I love to hear her pour out her heart to God. Tonight she read her book "God loves me" to me. This book tells of all of the ways God is faithful and provides for us. I love her precious little voice reading to me...."that is how I know God loves me." She said to me the other night, "Mommy, when I am in my room and my family isn't there with me I am not alone because Jesus is with me. When I go to my room for alone time, I can have alone time with Jesus." Yes my sweet girl....we all need to go to our room for alone time with Jesus.
In the "Something to try" section Sally recommends devotions, prayer, Bible reading with your kids. We have had many different routines with devotional time with the kids through the years. I would really love to hear what you are doing in your family and what you have found that works well for you and your children.

Chapter Four

Okay, so I've mentioned the "turning the corners down" thing that I do when I want to come back to something or something really sticks out to me...well, every corner is turned down in this chapter. I read it again today in the pick up line at preschool and it is so timely for me. The servant mother...that is so where I want to be as a mother, wife, friend, daughter. Yet, I fall short every day. Which is exactly it. I fall short. He never falls short. Sally says in this chapter that we need the Holy Spirit to accomplish this role of servant mother. I must surrender, stop running around tending to the "stuff" of life every day and being so consumed with managing the "stuff" that I miss the huge opportunity and responsibility of winning their hearts in the process. I have waited to post about this chapter because it is hard for me to grasp what all I am learning and all of the ways my heart is changing. This chapter and the things God is showing me about myself and my life have brought me to my knees in tears and repentance. I have gone through times in my walk with Jesus where I am learning things and changing at this manageable pace, when my circumstances are pretty much okay and life is "good." Then there are times like now, when God shows me that big changes are coming and big changes are needed.

Let's read chapters 5 and 6 in the next week, completing part two: A Mother's Heart for Her God

Chapter Three

I have to start this post by thanking you for your posts and comments. I feel so blessed by all of the thoughtful comments and encouragement. I love to read your different insights, advice and things that you are learning. To know that my friends are on this motherhood journey with me and to get a glimpse into your lives and hearts through this blog is very special. I find that so often with friends we chat at the park, play with our kids together, but never really get to the real stuff. Why is that? And like Jennifer said, I too would love to be at Starbucks (in a comfy chair with my venti soy no whip gingerbread latte) in conversation with all of you. But instead I am at the computer in my pjs after finishing the dishes and kitchen clean up before I start a load of laundry while my three precious babies are in bed.

The Undivided heart...oh how I identified with this chapter. The first scenario she presents is about a physician/mother. She talks about the dilemma we are confronted with, not being prepared for the reality of motherhood and feeling torn. Yes, yes and yes. I loved the analogy of randomly throwing seeds to the wind. (p.43) "Someone needs to take responsibility for their nurture, protection, nourishment, intellectual development, manners, recreation, personal needs and spiritual development. Someone needs to commit time and energy into staying close to them as they grow, encouraging and correcting and teaching." I found this to be so affirming for me. I felt like saying, "Yes! That someone is me!"
Then on just the next page she discusses the sacrifices we will need to make. I never knew how selfless of a calling motherhood is. The world is always telling me to look out for myself, put myself first, make sure I am taken care of. They are worried about me when they see me sacrificing for the greater cause of my children and family. I never thought I was a terribly selfish person before I became a wife and mother, but I never had to take care of anyone 24/7 except myself. Motherhood is revealing all of those selfish nooks and crannies in my heart. "In that moment the two conflicted drives of my heart stood out in stark contrast--my commitment to motherhood versus my lurking desire to have life my own way. ...I needed to accept days like this--my children's neediness, the myriad mindless tasks, and even my own occasional discomfort--as part of my partnering with my husband toward our mutual goal of building a godly heritage for Christ." (p.45) Oh...having life my own way...how much energy have I put into orchestrating that throughout my 33 years? And God has shown me that what he has for me is way better than anything I could have even imagined for myself. If I will just surrender, kneel at His feet and trust Him. "We yield our personal rights into his hands. We give up our time and expectations to him--and also our fears and worries about how we will manage. We trust him to take care of us and our family. We let him redirect our thinking and expectations and adjust our dreams. And we wait in faith to see the fruit of our hard labor in the lives of our children, knowing that he will be faithful to honor our commitment to him." (p.54) I have read that quote so many times...I want to remember it throughout the day as I try to keep my eyes on Him.

Sally mentions her symbolic tea cup at the end of this chapter. Do you have symbols like this?
Isn't it great that we are already doing one of Sally's "something to try" suggestions at the end of this chapter by sharing this book together on our blog?
We will begin Part two: A Mother's Heart for Her God by reading chapter four this week.

Busted!!

Before I went to sleep last night, I cracked open chapter 4. It could not have been more timely. By the time I stopped (I didn't even finish the chapter), I was crying. Yesterday, I treated my sweet 7 year old like a distraction the whole day. Oh, there were a couple of moments that I stopped to help him, but I made sure my face showed that I wasn't happy about it. He was asking so nicely...he wasn't being demanding...he hadn't done a thing wrong...and even if he was wrong, he never deserves to be treated that way. I am now 36 weeks pregnant, and there are things around the house that I really want to get done before the baby comes. That's what I was working on yesterday. That's important, isn't it???? Sure, the boys need to know that they're not the center of my universe and that I can't always stop what I'm doing to help them. However, I was so so wrong yesterday. I was so into "me" and "my stuff". Ewwww....I'm getting disgusted with myself just typing this. The more I read of chapter 4, the more guilty I felt. I went into his bedroom and kissed his sweet face. I wanted to wake him up and go through the day again, making different choices. That would never have worked, though--he gets his sound sleeping abilities from both of his parents, and he's really good at it!!! Instead, I waited until this morning at the breakfast table and I said, "I really messed up yesterday." "On what?" he asked. "On you," I replied. He smiled. I said, "I am so sorry I didn't stop to help you with your computer game and I didn't stop to play with you or talk with you." He nonchalantly said, "It's ok, mom." Just like that...he's over it. It's a new day...just like our Father, his mercies for me are new every morning. I'm learning so much from my 7 year old.

On second thought

Hey guys. Well, as you could likely gather from my previous posting this book is bringing out some issues for me. But, they are not the ones I thought would surface. I was talking to Stephen, my husband, about the book and my thoughts and he said something to me that I thought was really true. I think I am so longing for someone to tell me exactly what to do in regards to disciplining my kids that I am looking for Sally Clarkson to answer a question that her book was not written to address. I even misread one of the titles of a chapter: "The Disciplining Mother"....instead of "The Discipling Mother." That should tell you where my mind is. So, please forgive my previous posting with that in mind. I am enjoying the book, talking about it with Stephen, reading all the things y'all have to comment upon and growing as a Godly mom. Hope everyone's Easter was great. I have to say, it was the best Easter I have ever had.

Making my way

Hey guys. I am making my way through the book. I cannot quite put my finger on why I am not feeling so awesome about the book. The discussion in the first section about being whole hearted definitely resonated with me. The part about My God asking me what I had done with the precious lives He has intrusted to me and Stephen was a great, vivid reminder that I have to admit is helping me with the day to day. I have not read much about what I am currently struggling with the most: the implementation of the 'discipline.' I think she had been rather vague about what the means to her. This may not be something anyone else is looking for her to 'outline', but it is my biggest source of struggle.
I have read as my guide (and watched the DVD's) of "Sheparding a Child's Heart" by Ted Tripp. This book spends a great deal of time talking about rich communication between parent and child as a basis for discipline...and discipline that points towards Christ. It goes into great detail as well regarding 'the rod' which I have to say made me cringe at first. After reading the book Stephen and I felt like the things we learned would be very helpful in our home at leading our children to understand their NEED for the cross, and Christ. I suppose the early years are actually more fruitful ground for that discussion than I first thought. There is a lot of talk about mom's being selfish, but I see that bud in my kids as well. What are we to do with that? I am modeling unselfishness, I believe (although imperfectly without question). But unkind behavior, dishonoring talk and disobedience in a child...what are we to do with that? I mostly am hearing to give words to the kiddos. Not just any words...The LIVING WORD. Absolutely. But does the Word suffice in an unrepentent heart? Does modeling alone suffice in a sinful heart? I personally, as a child, and even as a student and young adult, heard the truth - even saw it modeled quite beautifully by those God undoubtedly placed in my path. But I think the PAINFUL CONSEQUENCES of my unGodly choices are what drove me to Jesus. I am not enjoying being the minister of painful consequences to my children. THAT is my struggle.
I certainly struggle with feelings of failure, with being selfish, with not living out my most important priorities and getting bogged down in all the things that one day will BURN, and to those issues I feel I am reading some good insights.
I am actually reading Chapter 6 now. I have to harness my available reading time when I can because I know that there will soon come a time when I am unable to read much at all.
So, I hope these things spark some discussion. I hope that we can all talk openly about discipline. I have found as a mom that it seems to be a little of a touchy subject among some of the mom's I am around. I have found it hard to be able to really talk openly because some don't implement the rod of correction. I will say, for me, that is not a big deal. If you don't and I do, then we can still talk about your discipline struggles. But, honestly this is what is going on with me in regards to the book since it is where a majority of thoughts are focused lately. "Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks." So what is spoken, both by me and from my toddler, is a manifestation of my heart condition. What can heal my heart? Diagnose it? Highlight the root issue that is prompting the short temper? The Holy Spirit. I need more undivided time with HIM. Desparately.
Love you guys

Chapter Two

This chapter spoke to my heart in so many ways. I love the truth she described in God's design and could really go on and on about our culture not valuing children and the mothers who devote their lives to them.
"The hard, daily, repetitive work of making a home a haven, providing healthy meals, correcting and training little ones, and constantly cleaning up messes is perceived as menial labor instead of the stuff from which godliness is built." (p.35) I think I have had this attitude at times too though, that what I do over and over and over again doesn't make a difference and it is frustrating to me. But godliness can be built in my children through it all!
At the end of the chapter I must admit I was crying. Crying because I don't want to fail, I don't want to be frustrated at the drop of a hat, and yet I realized it is not up to me. If it was up to me I would fail, I will be frustrated, but our God is faithful, he will make "sense out of the messes we've made of our lives." I have been quite focused on each day, battling failures, trying to do get done what needs to be done and have lost site of the eternal perspective and focus I should always have. When Sally posed the question of facing the Lord at the end of our lives and his asking, 'What did you do with those precious eternal human beings that I entrusted into your hands? Did you sacrifice your own life to give them my life? Did you pass on my purposes? Did you do the work in your children that will result in praise to my name throughout all of eternity?' (p.37) I deeply want to hear Him say, "Well done!" I want my children to know His love and grace and patience through me.
How does this practically happen each day with laundry, messes, time-outs, cooking, teaching etc? For me, I am starting with scripture. I have written several verses that I am committing to memory on cards and I have them everywhere, in the van, in the laundry room, in the kitchen, at my desk, on my nightstand. I want my reflex thought and words to be love and patience and truth and grace. Secondly, I am trying to keep it simple for my children. We are focusing on God wanting us to be kind and gentle. It is amazing the list of "rules" I feel like I was always stressing. I don't want them to just obey rules, I want them to know God and his truth. Focusing on being kind and gentle is "simple" and covers so many things. They are so receptive to this and I don't feel like I am saying, "do this, don't do this" all day.
What practical things do you do in your home and with your children?
Did any particular part of this chapter change you or speak to your heart?

Confused, yet peaceful

This book is speaking to me right where I'm at right now--amazing how God ALWAYS does that!! I have been a stay at home mama since we had our first boy. Actually, I was even a stay at home mom for a year before we had kids--now THAT was fun!! :) I have always had a deep conviction to be at home, and I guess I've always thought that would mean I'm at home until the last one goes off to college. I have some friends who work and others who stay at home, and I'm not a staunch "you must stay at home or your kids will end up in juvy" mom. For our family, however, I've just never thought of anything different.

Recently, however, I've been in a crisis of belief. I got a call from a high school friend who just recently stepped into the "dean of students" role at our junior high. She was the 7th grade math teacher before that, and they were looking for someone to teach 7th grade math this semester. She was calling to see if I wanted to teach full time this semester. Well, of course I didn't--I'm pregnant (due in April), I have a 2 year old at home, and how will I pick up our 7 year old from school (his gets out earlier than jr. high) and go to his class parties????? All of these thoughts came to mind first, but then we prayed about it for a couple of days, and God started planting thoughts of possibility and then thoughts of, "we could do this and it would be a specific answer to prayer for a financial situation in our family". So, I'm doing it. In fact, at this very moment, I'm surrounded by 30 7th graders in a computer lab.

I thought it would be horrible. I thought our family would suffer huge wounds. I thought I couldn't do it and still be a good mama. I thought wrong...

In some ways, I have actually become a better wife and mama during these weeks. Our house has never been in the order it's in right now. My gifts are being used in new ways, and it's challenging me to be more creative with my own boys....

...and yet I can't get past that deep conviction that my daily "spot" in the kingdom is in our home. At the same time that I'm loving the ministry that's taking place with these 7th graders, I'm also longing for the ministry that takes place in the "dailyness" (is that a word?!) of being at home. I can't wait for this "job" to be over, and yet I'm sad to see it end.

The conclusion that my brain has come to is that, for now, while we have "preschoolers" my "spot" will be at home, and then we'll rethink it once they're in school.

The conclusion that my heart has come to is one of complete peace--resting in my Father's arms and trusting him completely to show us each year, each month, each week, each day where my "spot" is.

I thought I had this all figured out, and now I just don't know....but HE does and He's so smart and He'll let me know when I need to know.

I would love to hear from any of you who have had similar wrestlings or crises of belief. Any wisdom for me???

Chapter One

Typically when I read a book I will turn down the corner of a page that I want to read something from again. I am finding that nearly every page's corner is turned down in this book! This chapter really spoke to my heart. I identified with so many things that Sally said.

"I soon discovered that life has its own ways of helping us choose." (p.12) How has life helped you choose the path of motherhood you are on?

"What had I gotten myself into?....These precious little ones had endless needs...demanded all of my body, time, life, emotions, and attention!...I often felt like a failure." (p.13) I admit that I felt a sense of relief knowing that someone writing a book about motherhood felt like a failure.

"This design doesn't mean I have to lose myself in my children's lives. On the contrary, following God's design for living is the key to finding myself--to becoming the person he had in mind for me all along." (p.15) What are some ways motherhood has changed you?

My husband and I were discussing this chapter and as Sally recommends in the "Something to try..." at the end, we wrote down our goals for us and our children. It seems that we have lived a lot "on the defensive" just tackling issues as they arise instead of setting priorities and goals and adjusting our lives and schedules so that we are spending our time on priorities. Did any of you make lists of priorities/goals? What did you discover?

Feel free to comment, post, answer questions, ask questions...I would love to hear from you.
Next week we will continue and read chapters 2 and 3, finishing Part 1: A Mother's Calling.

Just Started

Hey gals. Just got the book day before yesterday. Just finished the first three chapters and am so glad to be reading this with other mom's. My thoughts are many, but currently I am in the midst of some wholehearted devotion to motherhood and cannot compile my thoughts. More later!

Introduction

Some of us have read the introduction, and some of us probably haven't yet. No pressure. Read, post, comment when you can. I love how she starts the introduction with the image of a mother's hands. Do you remember your mom's hands? I vividly remember sitting in church next to my stepmother and holding her hands. I loved to trace the prominent veins and truly wished my hands had the wrinkly look of hers. I thought it was beautiful. As I type this I look at my hands and see the wrinkles and veins (along with a princess jasmine bandage from cutting my finger last night...yet another blessing from children, fun bandages!) I can't believe that is me now, a mother, with three children to love and nurture. I don't feel old enough, yet the calendar tells me I definitely am! So often I find myself instructing, disciplining, telling again and again...wash your hands, chew with your mouth closed, don't eat that off of the floor, you're being a little too loud etc. etc. etc. Sally is making me stop and remember that in the midst of all of the repetitive day to day tasks of motherhood that my children need my focus, my attention, my encouragement, my energy and my love. I must remember to get down on their level, eye to eye with praise, hugs, kisses, laughter.
In my last post I wrote about surrendering the frustration and negativity. God has really been revealing the importance of this and how to do it. During the sermon on Sunday our pastor was talking about peace and stated that "peace is not the absence of conflict, but the presence of God." The world would have us believe that we must manage our circumstances, but God shows us that circumstances are where we experience life! What truth spoken straight to my heart. I have tried so hard to arrange our days and plan for everything (why my diaper bag weighs 30 pounds) so as to not have the fits, tantrums, meltdowns. This creates so much pressure, that the first thing to go wrong and boom, there I am, frustrated, short tempered, negative. God wants me to trust Him and reflect His image and use all of my circumstances to experience life and show that to my children. It is Tuesday and the past two days I have stilled planned, but allowed the circumstances to come. In the moments when three children at the grocery store seems like not such a good idea, I quote "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1 and "Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness that God requires." James 1:19-20. These are not just said words, but a heartfelt cry to a Father who hears and knows. Who really cares what the people in the aisle think about me or my children at that moment. I care about showing my children Christ's love and responding to them in love. Praise God for His faithfulness and teaching me so much about Himself through motherhood.

On your mark, Get set...

Hello friends. We are in the book purchasing phase and some of you may have your book now. Let's plan on starting next week with the introduction and chapter one. My prayer is that God will change us and make us more like Jesus as we care for our precious children. Specifically, I am surrendering the frustration that comes too quickly in my days, the negative tone that comes too quickly from my mouth and praying that these will be replaced with His joy and peace. I deeply want my children to know and experience Christ's love through me.
I wish we could all sit on the couch with a cup of coffee and talk, but since miles and miles separate us and caring for our children and homes fill our days, this blog will bring us together to share our journey. I can't wait to hear how God is working in all of your hearts and what you are learning through this book, so please post and comment.